1.4. Hetero- and cisnormativity
In addition to gender norms, hetero and cisnormativity play a significant role and are reinforced by media, upbringing, etc. Below, you’ll learn what these norms mean and the disadvantages they bring.
Heteronormativity
Heteronormativity is the expectation that everyone is heterosexual until proven otherwise.
The video below gives an example of how heteronormativity appears in conversations (up to 1:22 – video stops automatically):
Cisnormativity
Cisnormativity is the expectation that everyone is cisgender, meaning their gender identity aligns with their sex assigned at birth.
"Coming out"
One major disadvantage of hetero- and cisnormativity is that people who are not heterosexual and/or cisgender must repeatedly “come out” by revealing or explaining their identity to others. This brings significant stress.
Every situation requires assessing whether it’s safe enough to be yourself, and when you finally do “come out,” you hope for acceptance. As shown in the video below, acceptance doesn’t always come easily:
Some people may also choose not to come out. This can have multiple reasons, including:
- Fear of reactions from others.
- No need to disclose this to the outside world.
- Not feeling ready.
- Wanting to come out in certain contexts but not others (e.g., being open among friends but not at work or home).
- …
Not coming out is okay too. It’s always a personal choice.